sicknick

- .
nicki's 101+1+1

everybody seems to have one of these, and i find myself reading them. so here it goes...

1. my name is nicole marie. i was named after a little girl that my dad had a crush on when he was a kid. marie is my mom's middle name.

2. i live in milwaukee...a great place by a great (polluted) lake. ha!

3. i was born september 4, 1975...making me a virgo. and i definitely am.

4. i have 2 younger brothers-james 27 and justin 20

5. i make a living as a bartender.

6. i've never been to college but make more money than many college grads.

7. i still don't know what i want to be when i grow up.

8. all through middle school and high school i wanted to be a lawyer.

9. high school was too easy for me, so i didn't do any work and graduated with a c average.

10. i graduated a semester early and worked 60 hrs. a week as a pizza hut waitress.

11. i hate pizza hut.

12. my first job was at a bakery when i was 15...i stole a lot of food to feed my friends.

13. my friends were always more important than anything else.

14. i lost my virginity at 15 to a guy who now fancies himself a 'gangster'.

15. i hate 'gangsters'.

16. but i do like some old 'gangster' rap cuz it's amusing.

17. i've seen hundreds of bands.

18. my hearing is not so good now.

19. most of the guys i've dated are drummers.

20. i actually find guitarists sexier.

21. i own a guitar but can't play.

22. i also own a skateboard but can't skate.

23. skateboarding is my favorite sport besides hockey.

24. every guy i ever hung out with has either been a skateboarder or in a band or both.

25. i grew up in cedarburg, wisconsin...so we pretty much had nothing else to do.

26. i had gotten drunk, smoked pot, and did lsd by the time i was 15. i haven't done any drugs since i was 19.

27. i started smoking when i was 13.

28. i still smoke.

29. i got my kitty for my 13th birthday...

30. she's my oldest friend besides katie and dana who both live in colorado now.

31. i don't like colorado.

32. i've been to minnesota, illinois, indiana, ohio, pennsylvania, nevada, nebraska, iowa, wyoming, maryland, washington d.c., florida, colorado, tennessee, and kentucky.

33. i've never been out of the country.

34. i have friends and family all over the place but never go visit them.

35. i can be very lazy.

36. people say i'm a packrat, but i just can't part with certain things.

37. my house is full of said 'things'.

38. the last time i peed my pants was in 3rd grade.

39. i hate feeling embarrassed.

40. i was in a spelling bee in 5th grade, but i was competing against 6th-8th graders and fucked up on the first word.

41. i always loved being in school plays and always got the lead...

42. but in high school i decided that drama club was for total nerds and didn't join.

43. i regret not joining.

44. but i did play basketball freshman year.

45. i hate playing basketball.

46. i once made flyers of this girl i hated and hung them up around the high school calling her our school mascot cuz she had chubby cheeks like a bulldog.

47. my best friend from high school now works at a strip club, but she was always a slut.

48. my mom's asshole husband hit on her at said club.

49. my mom's asshole husband kicked me out of the house after i turned 18 even though he was only her asshole boyfriend at the time.

50. he's the only person i ever fantasized about killing.

51. i wish i had actually done it.

52. my mom has always depended on men, and i've never seen her single.

53. i blame her for my stubborn independence.

54. i haven't seen or spoken to my father in over 10 years.

55. i blame him for every other bad thing about me or that has happened to me.

56. i know better, but i curse him anyway for being a dickhead.

57. he made my mom give up a baby girl for adoption 2 years before i was born...

58. i think about finding my sister every single day.

59. i've never liked or gotten along with girls very well.

60. most of my friends over the years have been guys.

61. i've never had a crush on any of my closest guy friends.

62. any girl friends i've ever had in the past would fuck up my friendships with these guys by dating them.

63. i never 'hook up' friends anymore.

64. i've never had a one-night stand.

65. the closest i've gotten to that was a guy i went on a date with and he ended up staying at my house for a week.

66. i have had friends with benefits though.

67. but sex really isn't all that important to me anyway.

68. i was 'date-raped' when i was 16, so that may have something to do with it.

69. he was also the only guy that has ever hit me.

70. i wish he would die...i still see him around.

71. since i've been in my 20's, many of my friends have died...mostly from drug overdoses.

72. i miss paul the most...his death was not drug related.

73. i miss chris the second most...heroin sucks.

74. my mom has worked with drug addicts for many years, and chris was the only one that went to her for help.

75. i lost my grandpa to cancer in february of 2003.

76. i'm the oldest grandchild and loved my grandpa insanely...i memorialized him with a tattoo.

77. i have 3 tattoos (counting a half-sleeve as 1) and want more.

78. my mom has more tattoos than i do.

79. my mom's side of the family is pretty darn cool, and i like to go out drinking with them.

80. two of my aunts married black men, and their kids are the cutest out of all my cousins.

81. i am proud and happy to have a racially diverse family.

82. i hate that milwaukee is so segregated...

83. but at this point in my life i can't imagine not living here.

84. i am scared of big cities.

85. i have a fear of getting lost.

86. i also have a vomit phobia...i know, NO ONE likes vomit, but i am actually scared of it or anyone that is about to do it. i start to shake and freak out...it's not pretty.

87. but i do find other bodily functions amusing.

88. i used to get in trouble in school for laughing when people farted. i would laugh and not be able to stop...i swear that people would fart on purpose just for me.

89. i don't understand why girls take so long in the bathroom...just pee and get it over with!

90. i am becoming more of a girly-girl everyday, but i still don't spend hours in the bathroom...unless i'm sick or something.

91. shoes and purses are my weaknesses.

92. i am also a sucker for a good black bean burrito...or cheesecake.

93. i haven't eaten meat since i was 16.

94. i used to hang out with a lot of straight-edge kids and went to a lot of hardcore shows, but i was never straight-edge.

95. i still own many champion sweatshirts though...i'm wearing one right now.

96. i like to make lists.

97. some people think i'm a bitch, but they don't know me.

98. some people think i'm a 'tough' girl, but i've never actually been in a fight...although i have been known to break them up.

99. i will never drink rail booze or absolut vodka...yuck.

100. i hate beer...i know, i live in milwaukee. suck it.

101. i'd like to buy the world a coke...cuz that's the only soda i like.

102. i will never own an american car unless it's older than i am. modern american auto engineering is shite.

103. i'd like to be done now.

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