06.10.04 - 4:35 a.m.
it's important to remember things.
look around you. smell the air. take everything in. how does this make you feel? if you thought about this exact moment 2 weeks, 2 months, 2 years from now...would you remember?
i've forgotten so many things that i would give anything to be able to remember. people, places, feelings and sensations...gone.
tonight when i got home from work i unlocked the downstairs door and walked in. for some reason i started thinking about the fact that i can't quite recall one specific thing about coming home and unlocking the door...as though it were the first time i'd ever done it.
and in the 2 years i've lived here there should be some sort of SOMETHING that should go through my mind...but there really are no specific memories that i can recall at all.
and this seems to be the norm for me. i look at pictures and can't remember what the hell was going on when they were taken...let alone how i felt at the time.
certain things. just CERTAIN things. it's like my brain files away the things that it thinks would be best for me not to remember...and then some.
i'll talk to an old friend who can recall exactly what i was wearing the first day they ever met me back in 1991, but i won't even remember ever owning something like that...let alone the actual meeting.
maybe i'm just being silly. maybe i'm actually just stupid and forgetful. maybe some doors are better left locked. maybe it was all the pot i smoked as a teenager. or maybe it was the acid.
yeah, i'll just blame it on the acid.
|what'd you miss?
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HOT - 01.09.05
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