09.24.04 - 4:06 a.m.
see ya'll on saturday...

i should be sleeping right now, but of course i'm not. grrrr...eva and i are taking the 1 pm train tomorrow...i usually sleep until, well, after 1.

MY SLEEPING SCHEDULE SUCKS ASS. eva and i have been friends for a long time, and we've never gone out of town together. shit, i'm just happy to have off of work on a friday.

so, bryan and i hung out on tuesday night and got really drunk together for the first time. i turned into a bawling mess back at his house after bar, telling him things that i normally don't tell anyone...let alone someone i've only been dating for a week. man, do i feel like a moron.

he's just so darn adorable though.

and he came to visit me at the bar tonight because he knows he won't talk to me until saturday. cute.

the subject of sex has come up...although we really haven't gotten too down and dirty yet. it's not that i don't want to fuck his brains out, cuz i totally do, but i just don't want to ruin this. i don't want this feeling to go away, and sex is usually what does it for me. weird...i know.

the bottom line is this...i like him and don't want to fuck anything up.

john called today (big surprise), and i actually answered the phone. he wants to get together and talk. ok, fine. i know i owe him that...but i did ask him what difference it would make considering he's already made all his own assumptions and won't listen to me anyway.

i just think it's so funny that he called me a cock sucking whore. he should know better than anyone that i really don't like sucking know, because of the whole gag reflex thing. irony.


stupid nicki! stop thinking so much! oh yeah, and go to bed!

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